jisatsu, kamikaze-style

Even though I don't update that often, I log on quite a lot to check my friendslist and different communities. You shouldn't assume that because I haven't updated in a year, this journal doesn't mean something to me in all the entries that I've already written. And frankly, it's rude to ask someone to delete their journal just so you can have their username.
(what's that like in real-life application? ask someone for their house just because you want to live in it? how hard is it to just get another equally good house?)

be original! live with what you have!

I had to trek 2 hours to see Blonde Redhead live, but they're playing at Pomona College. I think I need to transfer, now.

I think it took three viewings of In The Mood For Love to make me fall in love.

The first time I saw it, on my laptop with the volume turned down, the plot and characters bored me so I stopped about ten minutes into it.

The second time I saw it I had a little more patience, and I watched it until Mr. Chow left for Singapore and the two practiced their goodbyes. It started to confuse me at that point, so I stopped again.

The third time, I saw it in a mini-theater with amazing surround sound. I think that was what did it, the image quality and the superb sound completely drew me into this world that Wong Kar Wai created. I seriously became mesmerized by Maggie Cheung's movements, the curves and patterns of her qipao, the lush colors, the rising smoke, the texture of the walls, the theme music that sounded a bit like the ticking of a clock... and maybe I fell a little bit in love with Tony Leung's character as well. The part that really got me was Maggie Cheung's tears at the practice parting. They sounded so authentic, and in the viewing room it sounded like she was right beside us. That, and Tony Leung patting her shoulder, and the surprise that came with the abruptness of the shot; she came back, but we assumed she'd left. And at the end, how the chance encounters are completely missed, so many near encounters. Really, really gorgeous. It's not so much that the movie has no plot but that the plot follows the path of a realization, maybe of multiple realizations, and somehow ends without anything really being realized.

Thelma and Louise: Amaaazing film. I didn't anticipate liking it at all, but the themes of American southwest, road trip, and feminism worked surprisingly well in this film. Plus, Brad Pitt!

Tada, kimi wo aishiteru: Cheesy and predictable, but I cried at the end anyway. Also the whole photography theme was really exciting because I've only recently been introduced to the same processes (metal reels, whee!). Apparently this film is based on a book that was based on another film entitled Renai Shashin.

Su-ki-da: I liked the idea behind this movie (taking so long to simply say "I like you") but I felt the execution was poor. I didn't feel there was much character development, and I couldn't stand the director's use of close-ups (there was never enough setting!) and holding shots for longer than they needed to be. The colors were too dull, the angles were unoriginal, and overall the story was very stale.

Also, I wish reviewers would stop comparing films without plot to Lost in Translation. The latter is more like a travelogue or vignette or simply art than a story.

I'm sick of cinema & media studies; if I'm going into film at all, I want to be a director.

I'm in love with Yamapi~ Right now I'm downloading all the dramas starring him that I can get my hands on -__-;;

Lmao, with that bit of Engrish I was informed of my acceptance into Princeton In Ishikawa!!
Holy shit, after 15 days straight of dreams and nightmares and constantly checking my mailbox(es) and worrying over whether or not I used the right vocabulary and grammatical forms in this or that part of my application and feeling worse and worse about my Japanese abilities and wanting and needing - finally.

So classes started again, and by some weird twist of fate I think I'm happier with my one science course than the arts & humanities courses that I was really looking forward to. I don't know, it's no longer the subject matter any more - even if it's something I really like, an unenthusiastic teacher takes all my air away. They're not bad teachers, in fact they seem nice and friendly, but by the way they lecture I think I'll have to kick myself to get interested in the topic.

My roommate's running away from me, and I'm watching Hitchcock's Shadow of A Doubt.

It's not like Asia is planets away from the West - they're separated by a fucking sea. Instead of just adding subtitles, Hollywood decides to remake entire movies (copying the originals scene by scene) because Caucasians obviously can't relate to universal stories of loyalty and love when Asian faces are involved.

Taiwanese adaptations of shoujo manga are bad enough, but at least they're converting the originals in a different media! Why remake movies out of movies, when the originals are already brilliant in every way?

Seriously, though, it's the most disappointing thing in the world to find out that a recently-made Asian movie you love is being remade. I understand they're reaching more people, but it seems kind of redundant to remake something that's already so perfect, and there's always a chance that they'll ruin it some way in adapting it. Il Mare is a gorgeous gorgeous movie, and I really liked Infernal Affairs.

posthuma for icons.

I want to make some manga icons soon! Basically the last ones I made are here and here.

stuff that happened within the last month

- computer died, lost all my music
- lost my ipod software cd, so i can't recharge my ipod on my new computer
- cooked ramen in a coffeemaker at midnight
- watched 3 billion Asian horror movies
- bent down to release a ping pong table, had the 200-lb ping pong table collapse on my head. might contract a brain tumor because of it
- learned how to say "my roommate sucks" in korean
- procrastinated endlessly

basically I plan on failing everything except japanese this semester :D

Most of the time I don't have a destination, and the train is usually fast, mysterious, indistinct. But last night I was on the 6 train in New York City headed for Chinatown at 7 PM. I think I wanted to run into someone, but he never came.

i don't know what she's trying to say,
but i like the way she tilts her head
when she thinks and her gentleness -
the softness of her hair
and i'm glad real people like her exist
because humanity is enough of an affliction
already

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY MUSIC WHEN I GO TO COLLEGE?? ;__;

So I was looking up pictures of Yu Aoi and I stumbled across another film she did, Hoshi ni natta shonen/Shining Boy and Little Randy.

I look it up on imdb and guess who plays the bishie? Yuya Yagira, Akira from Nobody Knows! He's prettier than ever (and just a year younger than me ¬_¬) and damn, I want to see this movie, if only just to fangirl him. O__O

Movies that I'll get to eventually:

Chunking Express
In the Mood for Love
Fallen Angels
Perhaps Love
Infernal Affairs
Flying Boys
Swallowtail Butterfly
Samaria
Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring
Densha Otoko
Nana

And this still doesn't correct the fact that I've never seen a Kurosawa film in my life. :O

So many yummy geeky guys. And pranks (my favorite is the door labeled "Alchemy"), and the things that only nerds would dream up. Ahh, the quirkiness. It's too bad I didn't apply to MIT, I'm sure I really would've fit in with the tallness and the skinniness of them all, especially the bit about staying up until midnight in the computer lab playing video games.

THE GEEKINESS. Love love love.

It's too bad I don't like science, I really love the school. :\ Right now I'm banking on the MIT cross-registering program at Wellesley; as long as my dad doesn't protest, I'll be a Cognitive & Lingusitic Sciences major and be able to take Lingustics at MIT.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT I DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND IT.

It's a 100% money issue. they want me to go to mcp to save money, and to get money six years later. they don't want me to go to wellesley so they don't have to waste money, then waste some more money four years later. that's it, basically. "if college were free we'd let you go anywhere" - if only i got a few $1000 from Wellesley i could go there. IF ONLY IF ONLY IF ONLY. i'm worried! maybe i made a mistake on the fafsa, on the css profile. it's not like they paid two seconds notice to it, they automatically assumed "we can't get anything, our income is too high". if it's too fucking high how come you can't fucking pay my way through wellesley? THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING. not that i want $56000 from you every year, not that i think $40000 is a small amount to pay, just that you CAN pay it. it IS possible. and you launch into a 3 hour lecture, blablabla expenses that you DIDN'T include on the css profile! FUCK YOU. FUCK FUCK FUCK YOU. on the one hand you have the money, on the other hand you are stingy as hell.

I can't help it, I can finish his sentences in my mind without even thinking.

"For instance, the word 'bray'..." ... like Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf!... "as in 'Martha, don't bray!' Have any of you read Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf?"

"The Return of the Sith... blablabla..." ...Hey, that sounds like that article in The New Yorker... "Anthony Lane in The New Yorker said..."

"The historian who documented the Peloponnesian War..." ...Thucydides... "that is, Thucydides..."

I scare myself sometimes.